Western Railroad

Oh! Here's a pretty row I ween¹
All thought the wonders done by steam
You'll now not want to drag along
As I'll relate all in my song
For by this wondrous mode you see
You'll go four hundred miles per day
Aye faster than an eagle flies
For steam all other things outvies
You need not grieve from friends to part
From Falmouth you can take a start
And be in London like a dart
Along the Western Railroad

Chorus:  Smoke'em poke'em feed 'em fum
                 Hot water coaches now will run
                 And strike the people nearly dumb
                 Along the Western Railroad

Now if to town you wish to go
No matter whether high or low
Your pocket it will not sink low
If on the western railroad
No guards you will now have to pay
Nor coachmen say, "Please sir, to-day"
But then be hooked(1), young old and grey Cheated, Stolen from
To please your fancy on the way
Although the game is very hot
To go by the steam from a pot
I would sooner buy a little cot
Than a share in the Western Railway

How different things are changed you know
To what they were some time ago
For now you'll not have time to blow
Along the western railroad
You may transport your ?cows? and hogs
Your parrots monkeys or your dogs
By steam as dense as any fog
To market you'll convey them soon
Without the light of any moon
Start at eleven - in town by noon
Along the western railroad

If to travel you have a mind
You need not fear the rain or wind
So fast you'll go that none you'll find
Along the western railroad
Great coats then you need not wear
Though it may be in winter drear
For oh! Much swifter than the air
You'll pass along I do declare
The publicans must shut up shop
The waiters all will go to pot
And coachmen will be wanted not
Along the western railroad