Patent Steam Washing

Duke, bishops, earls lords, they all have got a share
Judges, counsellors, and half the House of Commons too are there
All up to their elbows in perslash kersplash
And rubbing a way for the sake of the cash

Chorus: They're all washing, wash, wash washing
They're all washing the company by steam

For the grate things and fine things, the lords take their places
Looking after the collars, the mantles, and the laces
to the bishops in their aprons the lawns you must bring
While rectors and curates award their ????nal ring

From Lincoln Hall many old suits are there
Tho they're most of them rather the worse for wear and tear
The counsellors wait for the silk gown and bands
And the lawyers have all their blue bags in their hands

From the stockings the stockbrokers hope for their gains
While tradesmen from the city still toil o'er their counterpanes
The aldermen are over the tablecloths haranguing
And the judges are all on good grounds out hanging

For the wet sheets the author or bookseller calls
East India collectors hanker chiefly for shawls
And the college of physician half the faculty are dangling
With the heads of surgeons hall to be ready for the mangling

O'er the irons in the fire speculators look arch,
The Society of Friends they are furnishing the starch
Directors of mines by the copper hope to save
And tho in hot water they are merry o'er the stave

The laundress swears 'tis the tale of a tub
And declares they will give these old women a rub
That unless by white washing they soon get some lifts
The subscribers will quickly be put to the shifts

The young blades they to Whitecross Street do go
And in three months they're washed from top to toe
So the soap the tradesmen over and their debts they never pay
And then they come out with their debts all washed away

The publican he says the steam it is quite queer
They had better drop the steam and wash with good strong beer
For if any of this company by chance should fall in
He'd drench them well with brandy and wash them with gin

 

Sources (texts, music) & Publishing data

Origin Broadside
Bargery Number 308
Latest Date 1830
Evidence for Latest Date Publication date
Music (Given or Suggested) Air - They're a Noddin (Not found)
Where Printed London
Other Imprints Printed as 'The new national patent steam washing company' by Catnach [Bodleian Johnson Ballads fol. 30] and as 'Petent Steam Washing' by Pitts [Bodleian Harding B 11(2441)]
Variant Set This is a variant The National Washerwoman [bar721]

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